Hello dear reader. You will be thrilled to know that I have made it safely home after my week in Tenerife. And my laundry is back up to date so I can take a moment to update the blog guilt-free.

As a treat there’s not one, but TWO videos for you. One ‘traditional’ format. And one using a different template - so its a bit longer… (if you can bear it!). I have also been tinkering around behind the scenes and hopefully now you can view them without logging on to Vimeo (I gather that has become an issue for some)

Vids are at the bottom of the page.

So - final couple of days followed their usual format. Get up, coffee, gym, breakfast, sunbathing, walk, sunbathing, dinner, bed.

All coupled with the rather annoying inability to tip via card machine in restaurants. I seem to recall that happened last year - but must have blanked it. Suffice to say ‘night one’ dinner got no tip as I had no euros about my person - plus the service was hopeless. IE main course arrived before drinks.

So after a trip to the ATM I had some monies - thereby giving me the headache of having GIANT notes - cue a combo of me paying for some meals actual cash and others on card with tip money on top subject to smaller note availability. Thankfully I managed not to repeat an accident that happened in Copenhagen a few years ago when I tipped MASSIVELY in error - due to my lack of Carol Vorderman maths and exchange rate calculation. Annoying as in Denmark they’re not that fussed with tips (am massively over-simplifying) - but suffice to say, should you find yourself in Copenhagen in the Olive restaurant - mention my name and you’ll get the best table in the house!

Journey back to the airport after checking out of the apartment was somewhat fraught. I say fraught now - several days after the fact - but at the time I was on the verge of a bit of a meltdown. Basically there was a nasty smash on the motorway between the airport and Adeje (nearer the airport) - so whilst google maps was telling me my journey to the airport would take about 18 mins - the journey from airport to town was about 90 mins. So that’s all the cabs stuck. All the busses stuck. I waited in total for about 90 mins for my booked cab to arrive. It never did. But thankfully ended up flagging one down on the street. Driver was clearly not thrilled with having to take me to the airport - as he knew it would take him ages to get back. And he spent most of the journey talking to, I assume, cab HQ, updating them on the melee. So when we arrived at the airport - I did some translation and thrust my phone in his face - and he’s attitude totally changed - all smiles and ‘thank you’s’ (I’d not even given him much of a tip! See also; Note Availability)

Oh - and of course at the airport I had to go to the bathroom 98 times due to guzzling 2 litres of water before security. TFS has undergone a bit of a facelift since last year, and I am liking it. Tho obviously am not liking traipsing through the airport for non-Schengen security. On the face of it ‘boarding at Gate A2’ sounds like a dream (unlike 17 at Bristol airport AKA bring your crampons, ski poles, comfortable shoes and inhaler) - but it is bloomin’ miles away from where i was lurking - so cue that slightly speeded up walking with legs flexing from the knee rather than the hip.

And you will be thrilled to know that I was sat next to the newly-engaged couple again on the plane on the way home. I had judiciously popped my headphones in the second I boarded - and didn’t take them out until we were on final approach - so I only had to share pleasantries for about 35 mins. I did take them out to listen to the security demonstration - when did BRACE, BRACE turn in to HEADS DOWN, HEADS DOWN? And they didn’t say ‘Doors to automatic and cross check’. They’re my favourite parts of the flight - but I digress - Transpired the couple stayed about 50m up the road from me in an ‘adults only’ hotel. None of your sniggers, It was a TUI hotel, so I am sure there’s no pampas-grass-room-keys-in-bowls shenanigans.

So that’s about it really for Tenerife this year. I was asking about availability for later in the year - I do love that place and its location slash proximity to my preferred food solutions. So lets see if anything comes of that.

I hope you’ve enjoyed following along with my doings whilst en España and I will see you again on my next mini break slash holiday for more blogging and dramatic videos.

Tenerife 2023 Summary! Long form.

Tenerife Summary - usual format - avec dramatic music crescendo.